


Attached

by Salrose



Category: Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Ben Solo Lives, Devoted Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren, F/M, Fix-It of Sorts, Force-Sensitive Finn (Star Wars), Idiots in Love, M/M, Poe Dameron Is A Mess, Rey Needs A Hug, Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker Spoilers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-05
Updated: 2020-01-05
Packaged: 2021-02-27 05:34:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,826
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22131850
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Salrose/pseuds/Salrose
Summary: SPOILERS TO RISE OF SKYWALKER DON'T READ THE SUMMARY IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN IT. After Rey realizes Ben Solo is not a Force Ghost she is determined to find out what happened to him and ensure he becomes one with the Force. Meanwhile, Finn and Poe figure out their feelings for eachother as Finn reveals the secret he was going to tell Rey right when he thought he was going to die.
Relationships: Poe Dameron/Finn, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 1
Kudos: 14





	Attached

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you to Joyful Phoenix who was my BETA for this fic.

Rey stood there after she proudly told the old woman that her last name was Skywalker. She looked back at Luke and Leia's Force Ghosts fondly. She stood there looking and then waited for Ben's Force Ghost to show up. After the lady went on her way, Rey approached Luke and Leia.

  
"Where is Ben? He went one with the Force didn't he?" Rey asked in concern.

  
"I know he did. I made sure I wouldn't go with the Force until Ben did." Leia said.

"So where is he?"

Luke furrowed his brow with a pensive look on his face. "He should be here. We felt his presence but not fully."

Leia pursed her lips in worry. "I've been calling out to him. He's not here. We should be able to see him." 

"Something went differently than..." Luke began to say.

"Than who?" Rey asked.

  
"My father Anakin. He went one with the Force and I saw him pretty immediately."

  
"And if he was able to be one with the Force then so should my son." Leia said in a haughty tone while folding her arms. 

  
"Leia, bitterness has no place in the Force." Luke chided. 

  
"It is not bitterness. I made my peace with the man but I gave my life so my son would go to the Lightside, only to have my son lost in the abyss." Leia said.

  
Luke placed a comforting hand on Leia's shoulder. "There must be an explanation. We will search for him. In the meantime Rey, search the Jedi texts about becoming one with the Force. Maybe there was something we missed." 

  
Worry encompassed Rey. "What if we can't find him? What will that mean? Does it mean he didn't find peace?" Her panic grew even further. 

  
Leia gave her a reassuring smile. "He found peace Rey. He died happy. I felt it."

  
"I did too for a moment but...how come I can I see you two and I can't see him?" Rey's distraught showed in her voice. 

  
Luke reassured both Rey and Leia. "We will find him."

Rey nodded, "I will figure this out."

  
She was determined to get to the bottom of this unfortunate mystery. Ben had saved her and she was going to save him. She loved him and her love for him would give her strength to see this through. She had to know if the love of her life found peace. He needed peace. She couldn't help but think about his wonderful smile after they kissed. His smile could light up the whole galaxy. He was Ben. He had completely turned to the light. He did the most selfless act ever in giving his life for her. She had to find soleless in that. She had to have peace with that. She couldn't find peace until she knew that Ben found peace. She wouldn't stop until she was sure that he was one with the Force and at peace.

  
*****  
The celebration to comenerate the final victory lasted for days. It was the third day and the celebration went well into the night. There was lots of food and music everywhere. Poe had noticed that Finn went away from all of the crowds and found a quiet spot in the forest. Part of him thought perhaps he should have let Finn have this quiet moment to himself. He deserved that, his privacy. Quite honestly Finn deserved the whole world and all of the happiness there was to give. Whatever made him happy that was what Finn deserved. Poe could be happy for him. He would make himself be happy for him. That was what unconditional love was all about. Right? It wasn't about your own desires. It was about wanting the person you love to be happy even if it wasn't with you. Poe couldn't let this fester anymore. If Rey came back and Finn and her went off to their secret little world again, the resentment would rise in him again and the peace he found with them both would fade away. He didn't want to be bitter anymore. He needed to let it go. So he went after Finn to his secluded spot in the Forest.

Finn was sitting there breathing in deeply. Then he turned around to the pilot. "Poe?"

  
"Sorry to interupt buddy."

  
Finn shrugged, "It's okay. I'm glad you came here. I wanted to talk to you."

  
"That's convienent because I wanted to talk to you."

  
They both laughed.

  
Once the laughter died down, Finn spoke first, "About what I was going to tell Rey when I thought we were going to die."

"That's what I was going to tell you. You don't have to tell me. I don't want to know. That's between you and Rey. It's your life and your privacy. If it was something that you wanted to tell her when you were about to die then you should tell her."

  
"I will, but I do want to talk to you about it first."

  
"Why? You obviously didn't want to tell me before." Poe pointed out trying not to sound so resentful.

  
This made Finn look down. "I was afraid."

  
"Of what?"

  
He looked back up to meet Poe's gaze. "Of telling you. Of how you would react. I didn't want anything between us to change."

  
"How would anything between us change when this is a secret you wanted to tell Rey?" Poe asked with an eyebrow raised.

  
"It still affects you because I care about you." His voice become very soft.

  
Poe didn't like the sound of where this was going. Sure he needed to vocalize that he could be happy for them but he didn't know how he could endure Finn telling him how much he loved Rey and how he cared about him as a friend. Poe knew that was all they were and that's all they ever would be and he had accepted that. It just was going to be so hard to hear.

  
"I care about you too buddy. I....ugh." He paused for a moment before continuing. "Whatever happens between you and Rey that won't change anything between us. We'll always be friends."

  
He then awkwardly patted him on the shoulder.

Finn's eyes furrowed at Poe in confusion.  
"What?"

  
"Just tell her how you feel. It will be fine and so will I. I'm sorry if I was being a bit of a jerk about it. I guess it was just me being upset of being left out of the trio. I like the friendship the three of us found. I didn't like that you two have your own little world that I'm not a part of. It's okay. I see how much you care about her. I am happy for you two. You'll make a great couple." Poe then tried to give him his best reassuring smile, relieved he was able to get through that speech and sound sincere. He really was being sincere. It was just difficult to tell the man you love that he should tell the girl he liked that he had feelings for her.

  
Finn gaped at him dumbfounded. His mouth fell open. "What? Wait you think that..."

  
Then suddenly BB-8 came rolling in.

  
Poe listened before responding. "Oh, great."

  
"What did he say?" Finn asked.

  
"Rey is here. Now is your chance to tell her how you feel. Don't be scared. She couldn't reject you. You are amazing." Poe's smile was more genuine this time as he patted him on the arm encouraging.

  
Yeah. That was good. He could do this whole be happy for them thing.

  
"Ummm.... Poe look maybe we should clear something up first."

  
BB-8 began to beep again while rolling around them. 

  
"We'll talk later. Now we got to greet her. Burrying Luke and Leia's sabers could be hard on her. We got to welcome her." Poe nudged toward the direction of the base.

  
Finn shrugged, "Yeah. Of course, but we need to talk later. Okay?"

  
"Yeah. Yeah. Of course. We'll be fine." 

And they would be. Because as long Finn was happy, then Poe would be too. At least he hoped. 

****

Finn wanted to stop right there and yell at Poe for even thinking that what he was going to tell Rey was that he had feelings for her. Sure, he did have a bit of a crush on Rey when they first met. But then again when he first met Poe they had an instant connection as well. They've been through a lot since then. In the past year the three of them spent a lot of time together, but he knew his relationship with Rey and his relationship with Poe were different. He could sense an extra tension with Poe lately and it got under his skin. Poe was so mysterious and he pretty much flirted with everyone. Finn rolled his eyes to when he saw him flirting with Zori. Maybe it was all in his head and he was reading into all of the looks and touches. What did he know about it? Being raised as a Stormtrooper didn't give him much opportunity for touching. He did notice some Stormtroopers sneaking to others quarters at night but that was never him. They were encouraged not to forge bonds with others but that didn't stop some people. Nonetheless, he wasn't used to relationships where you got to openly embrace, touch, and hug. So maybe he was so touch deprived that he read into every touch that lingered a little longer from Poe. All of his friends were affectionate with him. And now that Finn was free and part of the Resistance, he was able to freely touch his friends. With Poe it seemed different. Maybe he just wanted it to be different. He shook himself out of his thoughts when he saw Rey through the crowd. He could feel her grief flow out of her in waves. His heart went out to her. She was relieved that everything was over but she was still sad. Though she hid it well, he could still feel it.

  
Rey looked up at them as Poe and Finn approached her.

  
Poe spoke up first, "We weren't expecting you so soon."

  
She shrugged her shoulders, "Me either, but I need to be back here."

  
"Why?" Finn asked.

  
Rey rubbed her neck, "I just need to be here."

  
"More secrets Rey?" Poe asked accusingly.

  
They both noted his sharp tone. Finn could sense another one of their sharp witted fights coming on. Rey was grieving. They all were over General Leia, but he knew that Rey felt a big sense of loss that she tried to push down. A fight was the last thing that needed to happen right now. Finn was about to say something, but then Poe beat him to it.

  
"Sorry, Rey. That was insensitive. It must have been hard burying Luke's and Leia's Lightsabers." Poe continued, in a much more gentler tone.

Finn gaped at Poe, surprised that he'd apologized to Rey.

  
She looked up at the pilot. "Yeah. It was."

  
"Do you want to talk about it?" Poe asked, voice softening even more. 

  
Finn looked at Poe, impressed that he was really taking an effort. Poe seemed so short and angry and resentful lately, but he was really trying to make amends for that. He seemed to come to some sort of realization lately about them acting more like a team and being together. Suddenly, the terrible thought occured to Finn: what if his resentmentness and being short with Rey was his way to mask his feelings for Rey?

Some older Resistance member who was there in the original Rebel Alliance mentioned Poe and Rey bickered the same way that Han and Leia bickered before they ended up together. He dismissed the thought before, but now looking how Poe was now being so sensetive and attentive to Rey.... Maybe he was off. Maybe what Poe was talking about was getting out of the way for Finn because they were in some unspoken competition for Rey. 

  
Then Poe patted her arm sympathetically.

Finn stared at Poe's hand on her arm.  
Rey smiled at the pilot before saying, "Thanks but ... I just want to be alone."

  
Her two friends nodded. But then Finn quickly chimed in. "Wait, Rey. There is something I need to tell you."

  
"Can it wait?"

  
"Actually...no. I feel like I need to tell you now."

  
She looked at him for a long moment before saying, "Okay. Yeah. Let's go to my quarters."

  
"Yeah." Finn nodded, still feeling nervous about it.

  
Then Poe interjected, "Okay, well, I'll talk to you two later."

  
"No!" Finn quickly responded. "Poe, I want to talk to you both about it."  
  
Poe visibly tensed up. "No it's okay. This is between you and Rey."  
  
He shook his head fervently. "No. I want to tell you both."

  
"What did you say about secrets earlier?" Rey asked Poe. "I don't want anymore secrets between us. No more secrets." 

  
Poe sighed. "Okay." He then hesitantly followed both Finn and Rey into her quarters.

Finn really couldn't wait until this was out in the open so at least Poe would stop thinking that they were competing for the same girl.

******

When they reached her quarters, Rey was nervous and anxious about what Finn was about to say. She could feel his nervousness in waves. She wanted to ease his nerves and tell him it was all going to be okay. She knew as a Jedi she needed to be serene and at peace to show others that a sense of peace could be maintained. It was difficult with the turmoil she felt over Ben's death and the fact that she couldn't find his Force Ghost. Rey couldn't be at peace until she knew Ben was at peace. At least she could help Finn. She looked at Poe who seemed to come to a changing point. He was being so kind to her. She appreciated it that he was letting go of his bitterness she could feel off of him. If anything she could lift a weight by telling her friends about what was going on with her. She knew it would be a lot, but she hoped they would understand.

They went in her room and she found chairs they all could sit on.

After they all sat down Rey turned to Finn and asked, "So what is it you wanted to tell me?"

Finn took in a deep breath and looked at Rey and Poe.

"Okay, it was about how I first met the both of you. I had this feeling that led me to you both."

Poe's eyes popped out of his head.

"Us both?" Poe asked, looking really alarmed.

"Yeah. It was the Force. I could feel it and lately it has gotten stronger. I could feel things. I can sense things."

"You are Force Sensetive." Rey stated matter-of-factly.

Finn blinked. "Yeah."

She gave him a soft smile. "I knew. I could sense it in you but I was waiting for you tell me."

Poe shot up out of his seat before turning to Finn. "So that was the big thing you were going to tell Rey? That you are Force Sensetive?"

"Yeah."

"Why didn't you just tell me that when I asked you about it?"

"Because I didn't want our last moments to be of you being afraid of me."

"You think I would be afraid of you?" Poe asked in low voice. Rey didn't need to be a Jedi to notice how hurt he was by Finn's statement. 

"Look I know you do not have great experiences with the Force with what Kylo Ren did to you. And the way you look at Rey when she used the Force on the Stormtroopers. I could tell you are afraid of it. I don't blame you after what you have been through."

Poe blinked and then looked at Finn with sincere eyes. "Finn. I could never be afraid of you." Then he turned to Rey, "I am sorry if I made you think I was afraid of you."

"It's okay. I understand. You were tortured by Kylo Ren, of course you're going to be a little jumpy by Force users." Rey reassured him, trying to keep her voice from wavering.

She tried to push the thought of Kylo Ren torturing her friend out of her mind. She didn't want to think about about Ben as Kylo Ren anymore and all the terrible things he did. Instead, she wanted to remember him as Ben Solo. The boy who understood her in a way that she once thought wasn't possible for anyone to. But he did. He loved her and gave up his life for hers. That's who she wanted to remember. 

"I trust you both." Poe replied, breaking Rey out of her thoughts. "I guess it is true that I am a little afraid of the mysterious power that Force users can do with the Force. I don't quite understand it all. And yes I was tortured and that sucked. But, it's in the past and my issues with the Force doesn't make me care about either of you any less."

Finn took in a breath and looked at Poe. "I'm glad. Thank you." He a gave him a warm smile.

"Anytime buddy." Was Poe's response. He then patted him on the back.

Then Finn turned to Rey, "So Rey. Could you teach me to become a Jedi?"

"Of course. I would be honored." Rey answered before taking his hand in hers.

They smiled at eachother.

Poe sat down, staring at their hands.

After they release their hands, Poe spoke up, "So in this whole new Jedi training thing are you going to just ignore the no attachments thing?"

They both blinked at him.

Rey's eyes furrowed in confusion before she asked, "What are you talking about?"

"Well, back in the day, if you trained to become a Jedi you cut yourself from the world. You have no possessions, no attachtments, no familial relationships and definitely no romantic relationships." 

"Back in the day as in...?" Rey started to ask.

"When Luke had his Jedi school. When Ben Solo was deciding to go or not." 

Rey gaped at Poe and asked, "How did you know about that?"

Seeming to realize what he was saying, Poe tensed up and looked away from the both of them before answering. "Ben was my friend."

Rey stared at him in shock. They knew each other? They were friends? 

"Since when were you friends?" Finn asked flabbergasted. 

Poe swiveled his head to meet his gaze before gulping. He slowly began to say, "Before he turned to Kylo Ren. When we were teenagers. We hung out sometimes after flight school. We bonded over being big legacies."

"Why haven't you ever mentioned this before?" Finn asked offended. 

Poe rubbed his neck, "Oh I don't know because he is kriffing Kylo Ren!.I don't like to talk about our past. It's a sore subject."

"Your past. How close were you two?!" Finn's voice went to a higher pitch in outrage.

"We were friends who hung out at flight school before he went away to train at Luke's Jedi School." Poe explained as he rappidly started to tap his foot. 

Rey was still processing this whole thing. Poe knew Ben. They went to flight school together. Poe got to know him before he went to Luke's school. Before Ben became Kylo Ren. They were friends. They were friends. She felt a burst of envy build up in her chest. It wasn't fair that Poe knew Ben when he was Ben for a while. She only got sparse moments with Ben. She wished she had more time with him. She wondered what he was like at the flight academy. Rey knew of his loneliness that he had carried for years. But if he was friends with Poe, then did he have other friends? Did he have a girlfriend? Was that how Poe knew of this apparent no attachaments rule? 

"And how did you know about the no attachments rule?" Rey couldn't help but ask.

The tapping of his foot grew faster. "Ben told me."

She could tell that he was holding back. "Why?"

Poe let out a frustrated groan. "Does it matter?"

"Yes!" Both Rey and Finn yelled out at the same time.

He sighed. "Fine." Poe then averted their gaze, looking everywhere in her room but at her and Finn. "He was afraid to go. He wasn't sure he should. He also wasn't sure he could live a life without even the chance of kissing someone. So I kissed him to show him what he'd be missing out on." His eyes then grew wide before he place his hand over his mouth.

"WHAT????!" Both Finn and Rey exclaimed at the same time in shock.

Rey blinked at Poe's outburst. The thought of Ben with anyone made her want to punch something let alone with Poe kriffing Dameron. She shook her head trying to get the image of Ben with Poe. 

Poe flung his hand through his hair looking like he regretted what he just said. Then he quickly added, "It's not a big deal."

"So just kissing people isn't a big deal to you then? Do you just go around kissing and touching everyone without it ever meaning anything?" Finn asked through a clinched jaw.

Rey could feel the pint up anger flaring and building up inside of him.

Rey took a deep breath in before telling him. "Finn. If you want to be a Jedi then you need to learn to keep your anger in check. Maybe it would be a good time for me to give you a lesson of calming yourself when angry."

Finn looked up at her annoyed. "I'm fine." Then he turned to Poe. "You didn't answer my question. I am still waiting." He sounded impatient.

Poe looked at Finn looking like he was at a loss for words.

"I ugh...I don't know man. I guess...I don't have ...real meaningful encounters like that because I can't really be with who I want to be with." Poe then gulped again. 

"And who is it do you really want to be with?" Finn asked.

"I would think that was obvious." Poe replied before biting his lip. 

"Well, maybe it is finally time to say it out loud." Finn responded in frustration. 

Rey could feel all his anger among with all his other whirlwind of emotions toward Poe pouring out of him.

Poe pursed his lips, "I...I can't. It's too complicated."

Finn sighed and looked down. After a moment he turned to Rey. "Maybe it would be a good idea for me to get a lesson from you Rey."

Then Poe turned to Rey also. "You never answered my question about the whole no attachments rule."

Rey huffed. She settled down her feelings of envy towards Poe. She needed to be calm and at peace. "I am not going to pay much attention to it. Leia didn't teach me it for a reason. Perhaps the reason was that maybe she felt like if Ben was allowed to have attachments he wouldn't have turned to the Darkside in the first place."

"Who's to know." Was Poe's response.

Rey then took in a deep breath, deciding that now was the time to tell them. "I know. I...we had a bond in the Force. I could feel all of his regrets and his feelings about it. He felt abandoned and alone. So yeah, I think not being able to have attachments of any kind are more deprimental then they are helpful. It is Ben's attachment to his Mother that saved him in the end. She gave her life to reach him and it worked. He turned to the lightside in the end." 

"In the end?" Poe asked.

"I died. He gave his life force to save mine. I...there was a moment there when I thought that it all was going to end happily. I...I kissed him and we were both so happy. It was too good to be true. I suppose." Rey then put her head down solemnly. She didn't want to cry in front of them.

She wasn't ready to look them in the eyes about it. She didn't want to see judgement or anything else in their eyes or feel it.

Then she stood up. "I think I need to be alone now actually."

Finn stood up as well before placing a comforting hand on her shoulder. "Rey. I will be here when you need me. Whenever you are ready."

"Yeah. Yeah. Of course." Was all Rey could say before looking down solemnly.

Poe then interjected. "Whenever you are ready, Rey. We will be here for you. And I am sorry for your loss. I don't understand all of this Lightside and Darkside and different person stuff but...I knew him as Ben. Ben was a good kid."

He then put an arm on her other shoulder.

She took his hand within hers. She welcomed the comfort. Then Finn hugged her and the three of them hugged. She tooked it in. She felt accepted and loved.

*****

After Finn and Poe left, Rey went to where she kept all of the Jedi texts. She had the texts she got from Ach-To and some scrolls from Maz. She had studied quite a few Jedi teachings over the generations. Rey searched on becoming one with the Force after you die. There were only vague explanations. The language was difficult to decipher. She wished there was something to help her. Having comfort from her friends helped, but she did not tell them about her worry about Ben's Force Ghost. She wasn't sure why she didn't tell them.

It was hard enough to tell them that she loved Ben and he died saving her. He died saving her. That should be reason enough for him to be one with the Force. Yet he hadn't been reunited with his mother. He needed to be. Rey went over in her mind the moment when she woke up in Ben's arms. She remembered being so estatic that he was there and everything was over. In that moment she felt bliss. She kissed him and felt truly happy. His happiness was exuding off of him and it made her so happy. And then he died in her arms and disappeared. In the Jedi Texts she found passages about when a Jedi comes one with the Force their body disappears and becomes a part of the Force. That is what happened to Ben. So why couldn't she see him? Why couldn't Luke and Leia see him? They should be able to find him. Right? Tears began to pool into her eyes. She started to blink them away.

Rey needed to focus and find answers for Ben. As she looked more into the texts she found quite a few passages about meditations and how all answers about the Force could be assessed through meditation. Leia had taught her about meditation. She could do this.

Perhaps if she focused her meditations on finding this specific answer then she would discover what happened to Ben.  
She sat down on the floor, crossed her legs, and rubbed her fingers together. She closed her eyes and said, "Be with me. Be with me. Be with me."

She felt the essence of all life around her. Rey focused her thoughts on Ben and his long hair, strong arms, and his hands. She focused on her sight of him when he saved her. She focused on his warm bright eyes. She took a deep breath. She felt the grief of holding him in her arms as he faded away. Her grief caused her to lose focus. She tried to gain it back so she could see him, so she could find him.

Suddenly, she got a vision of him. But instead of seeing him as Ben she saw him as Kylo Ren. She was remembering a time she saw him through the Force Bond. When he was speaking with her, she noticed there were scrolls and texts on his desk. This intrigued her, so she stregthend her focus. She honed in on the texts on his desk. She was able to focus so much that she was able to read what was on the parchment. She read, "The secret on how to conquer death and how to bring the dead back to life by Darth Plaguies."

Rey fell down on the ground and so did the texts and scrolls that were floating in the air with her. Rey got up with an excited bright smile on her face. This was it. This is what she was looking for. This Legend from Darth Plaguies. This was how she was going to bring Ben back.

**Author's Note:**

> So here it is. Let me know what you think. So I have always been interested in exploring the whole idea about the "No Attachments" rule in the Jedi Code. In the Prequels they made it such a big thing and basically saying that since Anakin had attachments to his Mother and Padme that led him to the Darkside. Then in the Sequels it seemed Luke was doing the whole "No Attachments" rule since Ben felt so abandoned by his parents. So I wanted to explore that here.


End file.
